Mobile logo top image

 

resources button yellow

 
 

services button

 
 

contact button

 

 

Stepparent Self Assessment

  Female Norms


Introduction

Use this survey to see how well you are progressing in eight areas as a stepparent. 

If you are a male, click here to take Stepparent Self Assessment - Male Norms.

Instructions

  • There is a total of 26 questions. 

  • Every question requires an answer. 

  • Choose the answer that most accurately shows how well you believe you are doing in the area under consideration. For example, select 0% to 10% if you feel you have little or no mastery over the area in question--and higher scores to show increasing mastery over the area in question.


 

 
Question  1
I care for myself responsibly, knowing if I do not, I will have little or nothing to give to the people in my life whom I care the most about.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  2
Outside of meeting my essential needs for self-care, my relationship with my partner is my number one priority.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  3
I have fashioned my role in this stepfamily to suit my individual relationships and comfort level, rather than to reflect prescribed roles and unrealistic expectations-including my own.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  4
I am a full participant in all decisions that stand to impact my relationship with my partner and my stepfamily. My partner and I work as a team.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  5
I do not accept responsibility for the welfare of children over whom I can set no limits.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  6
My stepchildren and I are quite "OK" with the relationships we have with one another.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  7
I do not feel that my every waking moment should be devoted to the children.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  8
I genuinely listen to understand, and strive to communicate clearly, truthfully and respectfully.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  9
I treat each member of my stepfamily with kindness, courtesy and respect-and require the same in return.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  10
I am respectful of the fact that most members of a stepfamily have grief to heal.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  11
I do not allow people outside of my immediate family to impose plans that affect my life without my consent.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  12
I set and honor realistic limits and boundaries, and choose my battles wisely.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  13
I will not accept being treated as an "outsider" in my own home.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  14
I do not assume sole responsibility for this stepfamily's success or happiness.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  15
I do not assume sole responsibility for the housework.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  16
I require that others respect my private space and personal possessions.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  17
I do not see myself, nor anyone else, as "the problem with this stepfamily".

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  18
I excuse myself from being "caught in the middle" of conflicts between my stepchildren and their parents.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  19
I refuse to say anything derogatory about any child's natural parent.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  20
Rather than clamoring for an instant family, instant love, and instant acceptance, I am able to go slowly enough to allow everyone time to find his/her unique place within this stepfamily.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  21
I am reassured in times of difficulty knowing that confronting and resolving difficulties helps to create the ties that bind the stepfamily together.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  22
I'm strong enough and wise enough to seek out the guidance and support I need; and to use it.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  23
I am confident enough in my relationship and role, and knowledgeable enough about stepfamily life that I do not "take things personally".

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  24
I have forgiven myself for all of the negative thoughts, feelings, words, and actions I held or expressed about myself, my partner, the kids and prior spouses.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  25
I'm able to give myself credit for my efforts, for learning from my mistakes, and for the successes I have already achieved.

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery
 
Question  26
I allow myself to "relax" and "lighten up".

0% to 10% mastery

11% to 20% mastery

21% to 30% mastery

31% to 40% mastery

41% to 50% mastery

51% to 60% mastery

61% to 70% mastery

71% to 80% mastery

81% to 90% mastery

91% to 100% mastery

All questions require an answer.

Click the FINISHED button when all questions have been correctly answered.

Your report will appear in a few seconds.


 

All rights reserved. The reproduction, use, distribution or storage or of this work, in whole or in part, by any and all means, without the express written permission of the author, is strictly prohibited.

 

The Stepfamily Foundation of Alberta

www.stepfamily.ca   info@stepfamily.ca   (403) 245-5744

 

 

Powered by Helpmetrics © 2008